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The Roundtable: Elevator Music

You can only listen to one song while stuck in an elevator for 24 hours, so what is it?

We at HEAVE can only assume being trapped in an elevator is one of the most terrifying experiences in the world.  I guess it wouldn’t be so awful now with today’s technology, but let’s assume for a few minutes that no one is going to find you for 24 hours, but for some reason there is a song playing on continuous for these 24 elevator trapped hours.  So, what song do you hope it would be?

Mark Steffen - The most essential variables in picking a song to listen to for 24 hours while in a confined space are 1) song length and 2) amount of jouncing (how often a song goes from happy to sad, poppy to pathetic).  In this case, I have two picks:

Layla by Derek and the Dominos.  With a packed seven minutes of Clapton’s crooning, the most enigmatic guitar riff of all time, and the sentimental piano breakdown at the end, it’d be an absolute joy – while a heartbreaking one – to listen to his insistence for Pattie Boyd’s unrequited love (you’ll recall she was married to George Harrison).

On a more relevant note, Dan Deacon’s “Snookered,” off of Bromst, showcases the same sort of disparate bounce back and forth between celebratory and pathetically anxious.  The bipolar, convulsive vibe would keep me entertained for the entire time – and it might make me feel “okay” with the whole “going insane” portion of being trapped for a full day.

Alyssa Vincent - If I'm going to be stuck in an elevator for 24 hours, there is no way in hell that I want lyrics there to color the experience. I can't imagine anything worse than hearing the same phrases over and over again while in an enclosed space. That's why I've got to turn to my favorite instrumental outfit, Explosions in the Sky, to give me some relief. It's difficult to pick which song I'd like to accompany me for that long, but I'm going to have to choose "A Song For Our Fathers." Like most Explosions songs, it's got plenty of sound layers, so chances are, it'll be at least a few hours before I've memorized each and every climax. And even then, they're beautiful climaxes, and I won't mind knowing that they are on their way.

Amy Dittmeier - Well let me start this answer off by admitting that I’m terrified of elevators.  Yeah sure, I take them.  I get lazy, the stairs are too much work, it happens.  But I always have to stand in a specific spot, back right corner.  Don’t ask me why.  I blame this irrational phobia on watching Speed too many times.  Remember the opening where the crazy cop guys rigs an elevator to explode and Keanu Reeves and Jeff Daniels have to take everyone off before it falls and everyone gets pulverized?  Yeah, welcome to my nightmare. 

So I guess after I’ve hyperventilated and vomited when I’ve discovered there’s no way off of the damn elevator, I’d sink down to the floor to think about my last moments.  What do I want to listen to as my inevitable death song?  “In the Air Tonight” by Phil Collins.  I know this song is about drowning (supposedly), and sitting on that vacant elevator is closest I’ll ever come to experiencing sinking underneath the genial tides of the ocean/lake/bathtub.  Closed off from the world, only my mind to keep me in the game.  The walls closing in on me, the cold air around me, touching my terrified skin.  And then that bad-ass drum fill comes in and reality sinks in.  I get to listen to that awesome drum fill at least another eighty times before the authorities come and pry me out of my metal coffin.  Everything’s going to be ok, as long as I have Phil Collins banging away.  I hope when that hot firefighter and/or Keanu Reeves breaks down that elevator door, it’s during that dramatic last half of the song.

Andrew Scott - This could go very different directions depending on one variable; am I on this elevator along or with strangers?

First we will assume that I’m all by my lonesome.  Well this sucks.  24 hours of no one but myself for company, by that time I’m sure even I’d be annoyed with me.  To mellow the unavoidable stress that comes with spending too much time with me I would require music of the utmost relaxing variety, and there is but one album that fits the bill, Explosions in the Sky’s All Of A Sudden I Miss Everyone.  Not only will the music relax me, but its title would summarize my whole predicament.  If I were to have to pick just a single song from this album it would be “It’s Natural To Be Afraid.”  Why you ask?  Because it’s the best song on there… Duh. 

However, my musical pick would be very different if I were, say, trapped in an elevator for 24 hours with several scraggly looking strangers.  At this point it would be wise of me to keep vigilant and maintain my wits about me.  For this reason, and my sarcastic sense of humor I would pick Rockwell and Michael Jackson’s hit “Somebody’s Watching Me.”  Needless to say I would surely tire of this song after only the second or third listen, but with the combination of this song on blast and a stupid amount of irony, no one could touch me. 

Lisa White - The first thing that popped into my mind was the Saturday Night Live skit with Helen Hunt and Will Ferrell. Remember that one folks? Where they trap the band Hanson in an elevator and force them to listen to "MMMBop" on repeat? Forced repetitive music obviously doesn't end well. If you don't believe me, just check out the transcript of the aforementioned skit: http://snltranscripts.jt.org/97/97ihanson.phtml

That being said, I'd probably want to pick a slow and neutral song, one that is soft and will put me to sleep. And long, so the amount of times I have to hear it is less than a standard pop song. I'd probably go with either "Transatlanticism" by Death Cab for Cutie or "I Am Trying To Break Your Heart" by Wilco. Both of those songs I enjoy, but can easily be background music for me, and I wouldn't mind Jeff Tweedy or Ben Gibbard serenading me to what would hopefully be a very long nap.